Love and Sex in the 21st Century

The title of this blog seems to be something that I would of found on jstor while doing research for an essay! So as a geeky history student I have a pretty good and broad knowledge of social history - the family, interaction between the sexes, what was deemed respectable/not respectable between men and women before and after marriage. As we speak I am writing my dissertation on the ideal housewife of the 1950s. 

It occurred to me the other day as I was out with mates how the image of the ideal woman has drastically changed and with it the notions concerning love and sex. 100 years ago if you went home with a man who wasn't your husband you were shunned from society - called a number of names - 'whore' 'strumpet' the list is endless. Whereas nowadays it seems to be the normality. Guys don't seem to judge a girl if she comes home and sleeps with him the night they've met, in fact they expect it. Having a 'friend with benefits' is absolutely fine and I know plenty of people who simply refer to them as "no no its fine I don't fancy him or anything- its not like that - we are just good mates who sometimes have sex with one another." When was the notion lost that to have sex with someone you should be in love with them? I'm not saying you have to be married to have sex but you should at least care about the person and feel some sort of affection for them before you jump into bed with them. While my friend went home with her so called 'friend' - who she just has sex with when they feel like it, I pondered on this question... Has our society become so obsessed with sex that people need it so badly that you just don't need love anymore?

As a romantic I feel like this is a huge disappointment. If a guy wants to sleep with me just because I'm easy and pretty I would feel like a common prostitute tbh. There has to be something deeper than just physical attraction between two people. Yet everything around us screams that you have to be a sex expert and that everyone supposedly is. If you aren't no worries, there are great magazines such as Cosmopolitan giving you a step by step on 'How to give the perfect condom?' or '10 ways to satisfy your man.' It's a very intense image to live up to. 

Lets hope that guys realise that we aren't all sex goddesses and don't learn all the tricks of the trade from women's magazines. Bring the romance back! Boys - there are still a few of us out there who want more than just an orgasm from you!

In New York City

Well what can I say?
New York, New York, New York...
What a beautiful city filled with kind, friendly and full of life people. In short I absolutely LOVED it!
I've never been to New York but being a lover of pretty much every movie/tv series that is set there I knew what to expect. However, the city exceeded the high expectations that I had set for it.
The empire state building was breath taking, the view exquisite. Studying History at university naturally I adored every minute of being in the American Museum of Natural History Museum as well as going to everything that was found in the movie 'A Night in the Museum.' The boat tour round Manhattan was great, and an efficient way to look around the outskirts of the city and see some of the great sky scrapers, including the building of the new world trade centres, from afar. Times Square again amazing, statue of Liberty breathtaking.

A few pointers if you plan on going:
1. Make use of the subway system...my family insisted on walking absolutely everywhere and even though yes it is beautiful to see everything, your feet and legs will be dead. You may think 20 streets is not that far but don't be fooled by maps as it is further than you think...trust me!
2. Try and get some deals from the billions of 'city tours' that will harass you wherever you go. We got the empire state building and boat ride for 39 dollars which was pretty good!
3. I was lucky to be going with my family, ie daddy paid for everything, however, if you plan on paying for it yourself try and buy lunches and not eat out all the time, because it will be expensive! Make your own lunch and eat it in central park - which is sooo beautiful, especially on a sunny day.
4. Bring a raincoat! we made this error... it may be blue skys but in a second that could turn into dark grey ones with pouring rain!

Hope that helps if you plan on going! I can honestly not recommend a better place and I am usually not a fan of cities, so this shows you how much I really loved it!

Dreams

Dreams are a really strange thing and I had the weirdest and most random dream yesterday that I've had in a long time! I'm not sure if I believe the whole, dreams are trying to tell us something...but if this one was I have no idea what its telling me!
It was a bit of a combination of 50 shades of grey minus all the weird kinky stuff and the TV series 'Revenge' if anyone has watched that. Basically I was marrying this billionaire (so far sounds pretty good right) but I wasn't in love with him but he and his family had got my family out of some tricky situation, so ie I was the reward for them getting my dad out of trouble. The mum was horrible to me (the revenge part coming in) and despised everything about me however her son (the one I was marrying) was actually pretty nice to me and very dashing and handsome, cliche 'tall dark and handsome' thing going on. Although, he had this very secretive, dark side to him, like the rest of his family. So I end up marrying this 'Dan Adams' and living a life of partys and evening events, charity events - bit like Gossip Girl. But I feel so lonely, completely alone, its not that Dan is unkind or hurtful he's just so distant and formal. He sends me to a photographer to have my picture taking for some 'home' magazine, basically to represent the ideal rich housewife. Naturally, the photographer is very attractive and a fling from the past - Matty, my best friend all through uni but then lost contact with when all this family stuff was going on and then having to marry Dan. So feelings start to come back and I end up having this passionate affair with my attractive photographer of a best friend. Sneaking around, dashing off from partys to be with him. Dan starts to become suspicious but doesn't say anything his mum on the other hand has a hawk-eye so definately thinks I'm up to no good. I woke up when I found out that I was pregnant and didn't know who the father was, dum dum dum!
Super random right? Dreams are so weird...

First Blog

Wow so first blog...not gonna lie i never thought i would join the 'blogging' world. I guess people find a comfort in writing down their feelings and thoughts. Not really sure what to write in this first blog, atm i'm chilling at home waiting to get back to uni - watching the US open. I'm a huge fan of tennis although I've never played it. My real passion is dance. I dance whenever wherever. I'm lucky in that I've always been able to do it, even when I started at uni I became part of an amazing dance society who have become my family when I've been at uni. If I'm not dancing or studying I'm watching movies and series. I have a huge imagination so have always loved the world of cinema, being able to escape to a world which obviously doesn't actually exist but it does for a moment. This applies to novels aswell, I read books extremely quickly! I love the world of Austen, I mean who wouldn't want a Mr Darcy or a Mr Knightley!?! The problem is that I compare the notion of love with the movies or books. I want a Mr Darcy, Prince Charming you know the cliches... I'm not stupid, I know that an actual prince charming doesn't exist but I don't think there's any harm in waiting for something that closely resembles a movie or book romance.
I think thats a pretty good introduction. I'm out for today!